It’s because the (western?) default image of a break-up is a messy one. You don’t just “remain friends”. You fully cut ties and try not to even think of them until 4am.

If all of them cannot pool together and find another place, then shit’s bad enough that you might not notice. As you now will be paying rent on whatever house y’all were sharing.

I fully ate the Onion with the headline. Absolutely no doubt, just resignation. Only coincidentally saw the community.

I mean, if I’m busy all week a-huntin’ and a-gatherin’ I’d make a ceremony of it too. Didn’t even have Instagram to scroll, so why not luxuriate?

I got phone slammed once. I died.

Even beyond that the 1980s is like the start of millennials. I’d ask if this was made by LLMs but I’d expect even those to get something that dumb correct.